Using cutting-edge technology, the 67-million-year-old creatures have been reanimated and will roam a special enclosure in the new Hub RTP
by Chat GPT

In an unprecedented move blending cutting-edge biotechnology with North Carolina’s rich paleontological history, state officials announced today that Research Triangle Park (RTP) will be partially redeveloped to accommodate the recently reanimated Dueling Dinosaurs, courtesy of the North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences. The future of science is now!

According to sources within the museum, the Dueling Dinosaurs — a fossilized tyrannosaur and Triceratops unearthed in Montana — have been successfully brought back to life using a combination of DNA sequencing, CRISPR gene-editing, histology and an unshakable belief in human ingenuity. The newly revived creatures, already being hailed as “the most thrilling scientific breakthrough of the century,” will be housed in a state-of-the-art containment facility walking distance from HUB RTP, the 100-acre mixed-use development currently under construction.

“We thought, ‘Where better to showcase the absolute pinnacle of human ingenuity than Research Triangle Park?’” said Dr. Lindsay Zanno, the head of paleontology at the NCMNS. “It’s a hub for innovation, a cradle for scientific advancement, and—if we’re being honest—a pretty fantastic place for a world-class attraction.”

A Bold Vision for the Future

The project, dubbed DinoVation Park, will see a portion of RTP’s sprawling corporate campus transformed into a high-tech dinosaur habitat, complete with advanced monitoring systems, immersive viewing platforms and interactive exhibits where visitors can experience these incredible creatures up close.

Excitement is already building among the public. “I mean, have they seen Jurassic Park?” asked one Raleigh resident. “Because I have. And spoiler alert: it’s going to be AMAZING!”

Executives from RTP’s major tech companies are equally thrilled. “We’re always looking for ways to inspire innovation, and what better inspiration than living, breathing dinosaurs?” said one CEO. “Plus, think of the networking potential! Nothing says team bonding like brainstorming next to a grazing Triceratops.”

State officials remain confident that the project will be a resounding success. “This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to put North Carolina at the forefront of paleogenetic research,” said a North Carolina government official. “Plus, it’s just cool. Really, really cool.”

Safety? Covered

When asked about the precautions being taken to ensure public safety, project leaders assured the public that the facility is equipped with multiple emergency protocols, including redundant backup generators, reinforced enclosures and cutting-edge AI monitoring systems.

“Look, we’ve all seen the movies,” admitted Dr. Zanno. “That’s why we’ve invested heavily in state-of-the-art security. The electric fences are top-tier, and we have a highly trained team of experts who are absolutely thrilled to be part of history.”

Still, some RTP employees are already making plans to incorporate the dinosaurs into daily life. “They keep talking about ‘technically secure,’ and honestly, that’s the kind of excitement we need in the workday,” said one software developer, who has already volunteered to be part of the first employee field trip.

North Carolina tourism officials are already touting DinoVation Park as a potential economic goldmine. Plans are underway to offer guided Jeep tours of the facility, a live-action Dueling Dinosaurs reenactment show, and a themed gift shop selling T-shirts that read, “I Survived the RTP Dino Experience (And Loved Every Second).”

“This could be North Carolina’s biggest tourist attraction ever,” said a representative from the tourism board. 

Meanwhile, the NC Museum of Natural Sciences remains steadfast in its belief that DinoVation Park will be a triumph of human achievement. “This is the future of science,” said Dr. Zanno. “We’re pushing boundaries, redefining what’s possible, and proving that history can come roaring back to life. What could be more exciting than that?”

As of press time, reports have already surfaced of an “unexplained power outage” in the facility’s security grid. However, officials have reassured the public that everything is completely under control. And the public cannot wait.

Just kidding. April Fool’s, y’all!

This article was originally published on waltermagazine.com on March 31, 2025. A shorter version of this article first appeared in the April 2025 issue of WALTER magazine.